one more draft…

so i attended readercon down in burlington, ma, this past weekend. this was my first convention and a very good experience. as i understand it, from the literature and other comments in the con and online, readercon is a more literary-focused than many cons. it has a clear sf/f angle, but the conversations are quite wide ranging, as are the authors.

all the panels i attended were very interesting, including some seeming long-shots which turned out to be excellent surprises. i was able to sit in on several readings, as well. all in all, it felt like a very good intro for me. i learned a number of things about giving readings, presentations, etc., both in panels and in the readings themselves, and it was great to have the range of content present.

i think i did an excellent impression of a wallflower this year, but who knows what next year may bring.

one particular panel struck home, with that ‘well duh!’ affirmation of self-evidency that makes me feel like an idiot so often. this one was ‘waking up sober next to a story idea’, and the panel included kay kenyon, jennifer pelland, jeffrey carver, paolo bacigalupi, david anthony durham, and allen steele. describing, essentially, how to deal with those moments in writing when the story suddenly feels like junk, without any legs, and incapable of sustaining itself, when it felt so brilliant to begin with, the various authors touched upon all the main fears (self-doubt; self-pity; fear of marketability), and the tools for overcoming them (putting it away for a while [days/weeks/years]; bullying your way through, sentence after sentence; taking an entirely different tack [change pov/location/etc.]).

as i said, none of these things was unusual or earth-shattering (though all of their anecdotes were good fun, at least in the retelling), but i have to admit it was the affirmation of their shared experiences, not unlike those i’ve been feeling in starting this next book, which made me feel viable again. i had contemplated not going to readercon, mostly because i was feeling useless and unproductive and unoriginal and uninteresting (a lot of ‘un-’ words). this panel helped me out of that funk. again, i know all these things, intellectually, but i clearly needed someone else to say them out loud to remember them.

to wit, i owe my wife an enormous apology for not hearing her when she’s said the exact same things.

anyway, it’s monday morning, the 21st of july, and I’m off to start writing another book. thank you, readercon!

i arrived home this evening to another of my SASE’s. Unlike the previous two responses to my snail mail query letters, however, this one contained a request for a full.

!

seriously! a full. i sent just a query letter and the agent has asked straight for a full.

!

now, i’m trying not to let it all go to my head, but this has been one doozy of a week. all that angst and time spent on the query letter’s most recent incarnation seems to have done the trick. or not. perhaps i’ve just finally narrowed it to the proper agents? some of both? anyway, partials and a full in the same week? crazy.

as i’ve noted before, my blog-scouring and research has shown that partials and fulls are not entirely uncommon, and more often than not result in a no, albeit a more personalized and informative one, apparently. and that’s after the reading delay (usually between 2-3 months).

so, it’s now a matter of keeping my brain in place. i feel very fortunate for these attentions, but i can’t depend on them, or wait for them to bear fruit. i’m expecting to hear tomorrow about a book signing at the local Borders, i’m planning a trip to Boston to hit the bookstores in the metro area, and i have a few more places to send it out for review. there is still much to be done.

most critical, though, i need to dive back into book 2 and run with it. (ah, the joy of mixed metaphors…)

i came home recently, hit the computer, checked the email accounts, and triumphantly told my wife, ‘hey! no rejections, today!’

to which she sadly, and somewhat hesitantly, replied, ‘ah, there’s a couple in the mail there for you.’

dude.

i thought email was fast, but some of those snail mail queries got turned around and sent back so fast i think they told the postman to wait while they opened my envelope, pulled out the SASE, and a) scribbled my name on a mimeographed (seriously, that’s what it looked like; i could practically smell that old familiar tangy odor from the teacher’s lounge) rejection letter, or b) tucked my own query letter back into the SASE along with a business-card sized, pre-printed rejection notice.

but them’s the breaks, really. part of the whole suffer for the art, bit, right? at least that’s what i’m telling myself.

and then, almost like karma, i got a partial request! my first one! i know from my travels on the blogs and forums that partials are just one more step in the process and are dead ends far more often than not, but still! call me pathetic, but i got all giddy.

of course, i jumped right on it, and will be on pins and needles trying not to think about it.

perhaps equally ‘of course’, i received another partial request (woohoo!), which had me bouncing high again (all the more because it was from someone i had not ever expected to respond), until i read the bit about ‘don’t consider simultaneous submissions’, which deflated me in an instant. i was stuck, with the other one already out there. now i’ll be on pins and needles wondering what might have been.

timing is every-bloody-thing, right?

upside? at least another person was interested enough to ask!

not a bad week for query letter productivity. after what felt like a turning point in the query letter revision process last weekend, i sent 19 query letters out, 8 of which were snail mail, and 1 of which was a web form. within 24 hours i’d received 2 ‘thanks, but no’, 1 out of office, and the automated response from the web form. since then, i’ve received 1 additional ‘thanks, but no’. s’okay. it’s the way of things.

realizing the error of my ways by not directly pursuing the book signing at the store that just closed (still not funny), i stopped in at the local borders and re-contacted the inventory manager to get onto the store’s calendar for a signing. i should hear back by the end of this week about setting up a date, so stay tuned!

other than that, i’ve been trying to re-initiate my story-by-day work, though i haven’t been too religious about it (not nothing again today). this begs the question of just how committed i am to making a living by writing, but i’m going to pretend i didn’t ask myself, for the time being.

i will get there.

yes, it’s been quiet here. don’t get me started. anyway, hit a bright spot in my email last night, when i received the Kirkus Discoveries Newsletter for May, and there, at the top of the list, was Witness!

the review is the same as I listed elsewhere, but now it’s out on their site, all official-like!

Check it out!

quick update:

okay, things have been a little quiet on the foot patrol, recently (though things are starting to happen in review-land!), but i thought i’d let folks know where the books can be found on store shelves, so far.

having hit pretty much the saturation point in the greater portland (maine, that is) area, the following bookstores have agreed to carry at least one copy of Witness:

confirmed (as in, I saw the copies myself!)

• Borders by the Maine Mall (South Portland)
• Nonesuch Books in the Mill Creek Plaza (South Portland)

unconfirmed (haven’t been in to the stores this week to see)

• Waldenbooks in the Maine Mall (South Portland)
• Waldenbooks in the Auburn Mall (Auburn)
• Longfellow Books in Monument Square (Portland)
• Books, Etc. on Exchange Street (Portland)
• Bookland Cafe (Brunswick)

i almost took a picture of myself next to the shelf with my books on it in Borders, but it was saturday afternoon and there were a lot of people around and i got all bashful. maybe this weekend we’ll hit one of the stores first thing.

Witness, Book One of All Prophets Are Liars, by yours truly, has been officially published!
(Find it at Amazon[and Borders], BooksAMillion, Barnes & Noble, and, of course, iUniverse)

There should really be a lot more fanfare to this, or at least more consideration on my part, I believe, but it’s late and I’m tired, but it’s a happy tired. It’s real, and it’s out there, thanks to a number of people who have supported me without break. I can’t thank you enough, but I will continue to try.

I’ll post a summary of my experience so far with iUniverse, but that will have to wait until after some shuteye.

Here’s to many more!